Some of the Stuff My Momma Taught Me

#1) You’ll understand when you’re 21.

#2) Don’t depend on anyone but God, and maybe yourself.

#3) There is NO good reason to not go to church.  Unless you’re dead or actively throwing up.

#4) If you have a problem with your husband, don’t take it up with him.  Take it up with God.

#5) A house is meant to be lived in, not lived for.

#6) The more people around the table, the better.

#7) Investing your money in spending time with your family is far more important than buying big expensive stuff that your family won’t be able to use because you’re afraid it will get wrecked.

#8) There is NO good reason not to serve God at church.  NONE.

#9) If you can’t play, sing.  If you can’t sing, do it anyway.

#10) Eat everything on your plate.  Even if it looks like lizard tongues.  (Which came in handy when I had to eat cow tongues … and pretend I liked them.)

#11) Before you’re married, you’re your own person.  After you’re married, follow your husband to the ends of the earth.

#12) Menstrual cramps prepare you for childbirth.

#12 a) Demerol is God’s gift to women.

#13) You CAN feed 4 people at McDonald’s for $10.

#14) Be prepared to be unprepared.  Always.

#15) The menfolk all need man-time — so back off and let them be.

#16) Life IS black and white.

#17) Second-hand is frugal AND environmentally friendly.

#18) A chocolate bar in the afternoon makes everyone’s life better.

#19) Stay current on everything so that you always have something to discuss with anyone.

#20) There’s NO good reason not to make a mudslide on the front lawn in a rain storm.

#21) When you get knocked down, have a good cry and then get right back up again.

#22) A home is a HOME when anyone who enters feels comfortable enough to put their feet on the furniture or take a nap on the couch.

#23) Your life should never be completely wrapped up in your children’s lives or in the life of your husband.  You always need to have your own space to go to.  But when you’re not in your space, you need to be 100% there for your husband or children.

#24) There is far too much to do for a stay-at-home-mom to be bored.

#25) Letting your teenage sons give you noogies is okay.

#26) Everyone needs an afternoon nap more often than they think.

#27) It’s okay to discuss the Birds & the Bees at the breakfast table.

#28) If you’re busy, it had better be for God.

#29) ALWAYS save a plate when someone isn’t there for dinner.

#30) Your Bible should look like it’s been rifled through, spilt on, dropped in a snow bank, walked on, rained on and coloured in.  That means you’re using it.

#31) There is very rarely a good reason to buy a brand-new vehicle.

#32) How you carry yourself is far more important than how you’re dressed.

#32 a) But when you’re visiting God’s house, you need to dress like you’re VISITING GOD’S HOUSE!

#33) Don’t ever let anyone dismiss you because you’re a woman.  Get in their face if you need to.

#34) There’s women’s work and there’s men’s work.  Do the women’s work the best that you can, and let your husband do the men’s work the best that he can.

#35) Respect your husband.  RESPECT YOUR HUSBAND!  Even if you don’t agree with him, respect him.

#36) Every kid needs long amounts of uninterrupted time to just play.

#37) When you have them, enjoy your grandkids — especially when it means that every surface in your kitchen is covered with flour … and you haven’t been doing any baking.

#38) When the car won’t start, pray.  When the washer doesn’t work, pray.  When you’re about to slide off a bridge into the icy water below, pray.  When you can’t find a textbook, pray.  When you’re not going to make it there in time, pray.  Seriously, just pray.  God’s got it under control.

#39) Everyone needs an adventure to call their own.

#40) The ONLY thing that really matters in life is where you stand with Jesus.